i don’t need more ideas. i need more space.

how I'm creating more space for my ideas

You know when you've had your laptop open for months, and you have a million tabs open, half-watched YouTube videos, half-read articles, unfinished sentences on notes, and a never-ending to-do list on 5 different productivity apps…

That's how my brain feels lately.

It feels like it's on overdrive, and it hurts to think. As a nurse, I can tell you that having pain, even as slight as a headache, is a sign that something is wrong.

And few years ago, I would've just pushed through this pain.

I would've ignored my body and kept doing whatever it was I needed to do. But as I'm nearing my 30s and being a mom, I take my health even more seriously than before.

Anyway, I took this massive headache as a sign to slow down and to stop scrolling online because every time I'm online, I get new ideas.

I have a habit of consuming educational content, whether it's on YouTube, Instagram, or Spotify, about whatever I'm going through at the time. And naturally, when I consume, I get tons of ideas.

And worse, I like to execute my ideas right away.

If someone told me, "you need to do x, y, and z to get to your point B," you bet I'm doing the xyz in the next hour, day, or week.

But the problem is that the more I consume content, the more I'm executing on multiple ideas all at once. So, at any given time, I'm juggling five different projects, which I normally can handle.

But the problem is that most times, I don't feel like I'm giving each idea the time and space it deserves.

I feel like everything is rushed.

For example, this year, I decided to try to become an influencer on Instagram. I know it feels really weird and icky to say.

But honestly, I don't want to sell services or courses right now, so I feel like having a personal brand on Instagram might align more with my current values and interests.

Also, I just want tons of free products too, and there's nothing wrong with that.

So I went on YouTube and searched "how to become a paid influencer on Instagram."

I watched one video and I wanted to do everything that she said. But at the same time, I'm in the middle of executing the ideas I’ve had since January.

So, every day, I ask myself, "Should I be working on my new idea or finishing the idea that I've had?"

When I work on my new idea, a part of me feels guilty because it reinforces the idea that "I'm someone who doesn't follow through."But when I work on my old idea, I tell myself, "I'm not doing my future self a favour."

Either way, I don't win.

And if I ignore it, I'll procrastinate and return to where I started. So I've been thinking of a solution to win in this situation.

Here are some possible ‘solutions’ I came up with:

1. My ultimate goal or desire

Last night, when I felt overwhelmed with all the tasks I had to do, I stopped, picked up my journal, and started writing ‘My dream life is…’ and I wrote my dream life. I know my dream life like the back of my hand, but sometimes, I get caught up in the chaos of everyday life.

By writing it down, it helps me to slow down and to ask myself, “What are the things I'm doing right now that don’t align with my ultimate goal or desire?”

Honestly, there's one thing that came up, and it's taking quite a bit of my time, so now I have to have a hard conversation with myself about how to let that go, no matter how much I enjoy it.

Writer Sahil Bloom talks about the idea of "anti-goals" when you want to achieve great things in life. He says, "Anti-goals leverage inversion to complete the picture. Anti-goals are the things we don't want to happen—either as final outcomes or along the way." Here's a more detailed guide if you wanna read more about it.

In my case, one of my anti-goals is doing things that don't align with my dream life.

2. Giving myself space

The second, and I'd argue the most important thing, is to give myself the space to work on my ideas. This means deliberately blocking time for what I need to do to put out there.

This week, I tracked specific tasks I do to figure out what I'm doing and how much time I need to allocate for them.

As a mom, I only have 2 to 3 bursts of 30 to 90 minutes of deep work since I usually do my creative work while my baby is napping. Her naps are quite unpredictable, so I can get 30 to 90 minutes of work done during each nap.

And when I pick a task, I don't want to think about anything else, so I decided to do allocate a specific task while my baby naps. This way, I don’t feel guilty for working on this thing because I know that I’m deliberately creating the time and space for it.

I only started this week, but it's already been helping since I'm giving each idea the time and space it deserves.

3. Zooming out

One of the things I also do is become anxious about this whole journey.

I think, "Ugh, what if it doesn't work out? I spent years doing this, and for what? What a waste of time and energy."

Whenever I have these thoughts, I train myself to lie on the bed, put on my AirPods Max, open a meditation app, and practice a bit of meditation and breathwork while I stare at the ceiling for 5 minutes afterward.

I then think, "This is important to you, but in the grand scheme of things, this isn't that big of a deal."

Wars. Famine. Child labour. There are greater things happening around the world that are more important than my problem of showing up online.

“It's just content. Relax.”

And in those moments, I'm back to my old self. I learn to approach this whole thing lightheartedly and remind myself that it’s supposed to be fun.

Ideas come to us for a reason. They need to be put out there.

Give them the time, space, and attention they deserve.

What about you? What are your struggles when it comes to your ideas?

Until next time,

J ❤️