💌 I stopped obsessing over the $10K month
The Backward's Law, show up anyway, take advantage of your current job
Hello from a very remote First Nations community,
This month, I expect to hit my first over $10K from 2 sources: travel nursing and Airbnb.
When you first encounter the financial freedom movement, you use an arbitrary number like making $10K in one month as a way to measure your success.
I went from coaching on Instagram to writing on Medium to doing freelance writing so I could achieve that $10K.
But doing that made me more confused than ever as I chased a random number I saw online.
One day, I decided I didn't want to chase that number anymore.
I didn't want an arbitrary number to define my success or happiness.
So I avoided all the projects that didn't align with me for now despite knowing I could make money with them (i.e., freelance writing, selling digital products).
And by following what feels right, in this case, doing travel nursing and doing Airbnb during my partner and I’s travels, I managed to achieve somehow that $10K I've wanted for so long.
The best part is that receiving that $10K didn't feel like work.
By letting go of the obsession to make $10K, that's when it came to me with the least resistance.
And apparently, this irony has a name called the Backward's Law, coined by writer and philosopher Alan Watts.
The backward's law proposes that "the more we pursue something, the more we achieve the opposite of what we truly want and the more disappointed we'll be. Or simply put, the harder we try, the harder we'll succeed."
It also applies to happiness. The more we try to be happy, the unhappier we become.
So, what's the solution?
Let go of the thing and let it come to you.
Stop obsessing over the thing you want the most, and that's when you'll actually get it.
Here are some ways you can apply the Backward’s Law in your life:
Accept your current circumstance
If you're unhappy with your current situation, you somehow need to learn how to accept it.
By learning how to accept your current reality, your brain somehow understands and that’s when the discontent dissipates. From here, you can learn how to solve your current problems and spot opportunities. For example, I've been obsessing over leaving nursing for the longest time.
And once I stopped wanting to leave the nursing profession, I found a new industry (i.e., travel nursing) that checks the boxes of what I want in a job:
respect from the people I'm serving
respect from the people I work
flexible where I can take a vacation for months
My job wish list isn't anything fancy. It's basic human rights if you ask me, but it was hard to achieve that in my previous workplace. But by accepting my current circumstance and being open to new and exciting adventures, I was able to find something else that suit my needs.
Do your best but don't try too hard
This advice goes against everything that we know.
We've heard our parents, mentors, and society say, "if you try hard, you'll succeed." While this advice is helpful in the short term, it's probably not the best in the long run.
If I had tried hard in my previous nursing job, I still wouldn't make the money I'd be making now as a travel nurse. For reference, I'm making $10K (pre-taxed) in 2 weeks in this remote community.
I would've needed to work full-time for 2 months in my previous job to achieve that income level.
I'm doing my best in my current job, but I'm not trying too hard.
I'm showing up as the best nurse I can be, but I'm not chasing the jobs that will make me the most money but more stressful.
Having self-confidence is one thing, but having self-trust?
That's a whole different game, especially when you're a creator.
Self-confidence is your ability to show up online talking about a specific topic. But self-trust, imo, is your ability to believe in yourself despite not getting your desired results.
This is about trusting that you'll make money or have that successful business you want as long as you're doing the work.
By learning to trust yourself, you give yourself ample time to learn, make mistakes and create projects you're proud of that will eventually get you the results you want.
If you obsess over wanting happiness, love, money, or freedom, try applying one of these three things—acceptance, trying less, and trusting yourself— for a week and see what happens.
I bet you something magical will happen. 😊
🧚 2 Fairy Tips for Multipassionate Creators
On writing: Show up anyway
You probably know about the power of consistency as a creator. But sometimes, we think that consistency means writing a long blog post every single week. In this newsletter issue, Salman Ansary talks about how he underestimated the power of showing up every day for 6 months and publishing a book within that time frame. Although I no longer write and publish essays every day, I did this challenge back in 2020 with Ship 30 for 30. But I still take the ship something every day to heart whether that’s a tweet, a blog post, and a video. Showing up doesn’t have to be a big thing. Sometimes it can be writing one sentence and that’s it.
On life: You can change your life in 6 months
I recently came across this YouTube video where the creator talks about the Parkinson’s Law. If you’re unfamiliar with it, Parkinson's Law is “the old adage that work expands to fill the time allotted for its completion.” If you think it takes 2 weeks to finish a blog post, it’ll take you 2 weeks to write it. Similarly, if you believe that it’ll take you 2 years reach your fitness goal, it’ll take you that time that you allocated for it. So if you believe you can change your life in 6 months, you can. You just need intense focus and of course, realistic actions.
✨ Latest Work On The Internet
✍️ Why ‘Figuring Out What You Want in Life' is Unhelpful. In this article, I share why I no longer believe in trying to figure out what you want in your life. After trying to do it for 2+ years, I’m starting to go with the flow. 🛶
🎥 Watch this before you quit your nursing job. In this video, I share how you can take advantage of your current job situation before you decide to take the leap of quitting your job. 🤓
🤔 A question for you this week:
What are you obsessing about and how can you let go of it for at least a week?
With online love 💌 ,
P.S. Sorry for the long post this week. As always let me know if you liked this newsletter or if you’d like me to cover any other topic you’re curious about.